Moral Dilemma

I had a long-term relationship, but it’s over. I am regrouping and trying to move on. We lived together in an apartment while together and eventually became engaged. For someone who dated regularly, it meant that I had at last settled down. I am at that age when major milestones happen and the future begins to form. Images of married life populated my dreams. Now that I am moving so I don’t have to live with memories, I need to go through my stuff. He took most of his things all at one time, clearing out the closets and cupboards. At first, the apartment seemed very empty with only my absent voice piercing the silence. In other words, it was quiet and lonely. I know that a good relationship awaits me out there and that I will find someone to love. Meanwhile I will resume dating on a regular basis as I had before.

Objects bring back memories as you can imagine. I had a rush of them when in cleaning out some boxes left in the closet I found an old automatic watch that belonged to my former fiancé. At first it was painful to see it as he used to wear it every day. I remember that finally it stopped working and he cast it aside. I don’t know why he didn’t get it repaired although I made the suggestion. I never saw him sporting a new watch. I suppose it was going to happen, but then we broke up. Now I am looking at my past in the face. I debated with myself over what to do with it. The first thought, of course, was to call him and return it. I hesitated before I would go that route. Frankly, I was not anxious to hear his voice or get into an argument as to whether he would come get it or I would bring it over. The easiest thing would be to just get rid of it. It was no moral dilemma as it didn’t work. I knew that it was reparable and would last a long time if he took it to a watch repair shop. On the other hand, maybe he is wearing the latest men’s automatic watch by now. There are all kinds of new models with upgraded bells and whistles. I simply didn’t want to call him and ask.

I sat around wondering what to do for a few days and then I called. He was pleased to get the watch back and we agreed to meet at a local café. We had a nice conversation before I turned it over and ended up leaving as friends. I wasn’t sorry about this turn of events. I would no longer worry about running into him with another woman and becoming embarrassed. After all, we had spent a lot of time together and had a lot in common. We could go to a movie or have a meal and not call it a date. A lot of exes find that this is a workable situation. Why not me?